You guys, I hate marketing. Health care marketing tends to be either fear based (consume this or you will die painfully/catch a horrible disease/be ugly and unpopular) or sets unreasonable expectations (consume this and you’ll be full of life, energy, beauty, and general sexiness). I guess that’s mass marketing in general, but there is something about applying it to what I do–making a personal connection and really helping someone–that is very off putting to me. But if I don’t do it, then I don’t get customers, and if I don’t get customers, I have to look for a “real job,” one where my talents will likely be underutilized, and I’m making widgets instead of helping people.

Optimally, people see me on a regular basis, increasing the time between visits as they are getting healthier, until they feel well enough that I don’t expect to see them anymore. Over the years, I have seen a lot of temporary relief. I have seen plenty of people not have significant improvement. Most of those, I take with a large rock of halite, because if someone’s had a condition a long time and sees me sporadically once or twice? I’m not expecting much, in the same way that if a pneumonia patient takes one or two antibiotics a few days apart, that patient is still going to have pneumonia!

I’ve also had some unexpectedly awesome results.

  • “He could smell and taste his last holiday meal.” (cancer patient with anosmia)
  • “I sat up all night looking at the Christmas tree. I could see it.” (severe macular degeneration)
  • “I don’t know if it was the acupuncture, but I can tell you my husband and I were trying for four years, and I was never pregnant before!” (actually, I don’t even remember if I was treating this young lady particularly for infertility. Oh yeah, it was for amenorrhea. Which after a while was a symptom instead of a syndrome.)

Looking for your Christmas miracle? I’ve facilitated a few. I’m not going to guarantee it, but let’s see what we can do. “I can pick up my baby girl, and it doesn’t hurt.” Merry Christmas, dude who was in daily sciatic pain since January!